The HK Girls

James Koo
jtkoo@hotmail.com

War, SARS, and poor economy seem to dominate the headlines these days. Let me talk about something more cheerful. A female Lighter suggested I write something about HK girls. I knew nothing about HK girls when I was at Puiching, and even less now. That however, uniquely qualifies me to discuss this subject. How come? Just read on.

I wrote this article almost six months ago and then submitted to a panel of female Lighters for comments. One suggested Winnie should get mad at me—she did without reading the article as she trusted that female Lighter. I had to rewrite the article. Another suggested too long, so I deleted several sections left with only the leading sentences. 

HK girls are the most beautiful. First, my wife Winnie is a (Shanghainese) HK girl; therefore this statement is a truism allowing no further discussion. 

I still remember my first day at Puiching. Recently came from Shanghai where all the girls wore drab blue formless Mao suits, I noticed the HK girls sat in next column with well-fitted, smoothly ironed, freshly starched school uniforms were so very beautiful. That noon, returning from lunch break back to school, I noticed one of the most beautiful with a ponytail was waiting at the bus station. Since then, I would always look forward to the bus ride to school for the next year and half. Today, sometimes passing that bus station, I would still “see” the beautiful pony tailed HK girl there. And there were many others at Puiching left me with beautiful life long memories. A Lighter said I am infatuated with Puiching girls, another claimed I am a secret admirer of the Puiching girl at the bus station. The bottom line, Puiching and therefore HK girls are beautiful. Of course, Maryknoll girls are also (Winnie is one).

There is a special way to appreciate the beauty of HK girls. If you stand by the corners watching them go by, you will get arrested for loitering or the beautiful HK girls will glare back at you or even call the police. The proper way is to turn your head looking back at them while walk into a lamp pole or fall into a manhole. They will love that. If you are tall, dark, handsome and rich, they may even come back to see if you are A.OK.

Compared with their sisters in the north, HK girls are smaller. Good things come in small packages. … … . 

HK girls are the most impressive. On the bus to school then, there were many Maryknoll girls. They all spoke English among themselves. Could not understand a word what they were saying, I was impressed. Later after marrying Winnie, a Maryknoll girl, I found they talk Cantonese to each other. They told me that they spoke English on the bus to impress us Puiching “ma lau tou.” Possibly impressing for me, depressing for them as one of them ended up marrying a ma lau tou. I wonder who has the last laugh.

HK girls have a very high self-esteem. In HK, mainlanders are considered a little better than the scum. I do not know any HK girl either married or even dated any mainlanders. Winnie will tell you she married me, a mainlander, due to momentary insanity. I think she lost her senses after banging her head on the ice in the skating rink (a previous article).

The HK girls are very smart. A female Lighter got almost all the awards when we graduated. … … .

HK girls are the most creative. At the HK reunion, Gina Mok illustrated how to pack a suitcase by rolling up all the clothes so it can be packed tightly without causing any wrinkles. Understand she is an expert cook, and taught cooking onetime. I wondered if this has anything to do with this creative idea. I cannot help myself thinking one day the custom inspector would think I have a bag full of “Chinese egg rolls” in my suitcase.

HK girls are most sophisticated and cosmopolitan. Hong Kong is the most name brand conscious city in the world. … … .

HK girls are the most realistic. As a city, HK claims to have the most newspapers, and magazines in the world. But there is not a single magazine about prince of charming riding a white horse and other romantic love stories catering to HK girls. HK girls simply do not indulge in these daydreams. They have no illusions. They are fully aware of the shortcomings, and faults of men and have solid plans to change, improve, or even remake their men. While a lot of women in the world will do the same, the HK girls will do it without their men’s knowledge. Please don’t ask me how do I know. I do not know.

HK girls are the most pragmatic. … … . 

HK girls are very “outgoing.” One day coming home, I was told there would be no dinner as we had a power failure earlier. Knowing we have gas stove, not a birthday, anniversary or any special date, I quickly suggested, “I saw a nice new restaurant on the way home, and we should try their candle light special tonight.” My goal is to reduce these incidences to minimum—take her out before she suggests. Actually with small home, hot kitchen, HK people, and HK girls in particular, eat out in air-conditioned restaurants often.

HK girls make the best partners. Many HK men immigrate. Their wives are often the best partners in establishing themselves in foreign lands. I would say, “Besides every successful HK man, there is a HK woman.” That is, they are also good in the boardroom.

HK girls are very hard working. While majority of the male Lighters have retired, few of the female Lighters have done that. … … .

HK girls are most precious, as they do not make that many of them anymore. The child birth rate for woman in HK is less than 1, the lowest in the world. … … .

Now why I am uniquely qualified to discuss HK girls while proclaiming knowing nothing about them? When I was working at Bell Labs years ago, we have a rule for the lunchtime topics. There must be no authority present, and then all of us could participate. With over 70% of the technical staff being doctorates, several Nobel laureates, the Lab had authorities in almost every field. Women became one of the most discussed subjects then. After listening to them day after day for 5 years, I thought I knew all about women until I got married. Then found how little I know or they know about women. The worst ignorance is being ignorant about your ignorance. It was most stupid for me even to think I could ever know about women. Now I am aware I know nothing about women and HK girls in particular, so I can freely talk about them. Is there an authority among the Lighters? If you happened married to a HK girl, look at her; do you see her as she was when she said, “I do?” I do.